Feedback is one of the most powerful tools a manager has, and one of the most consistently avoided. Most managers know they should give more of it. Many find reasons not to: the timing feels wrong, they are not sure how it will land, they do not want to damage the relationship. The result is that people go weeks or months without knowing how they are doing, and by the time feedback does arrive it often comes as a surprise, at a review, or in the middle of a performance concern.
Feedback is not a one-off event. It is a culture. And culture is built by the small, consistent moments: a specific observation after a presentation, a direct conversation when something needs to change, a genuine acknowledgement when someone does something well.
Why managers avoid feedback
The avoidance is almost always rooted in discomfort: fear of conflict, fear of damaging a good relationship, or uncertainty about whether the observation is fair. Developmental feedback in particular gets deferred: it can wait until the next review, until after the project, until there is more data.
But avoidance has a cost. Without feedback, people cannot improve. They repeat the same patterns, unaware that anything needs to change. They may also sense that something is wrong but not know what, which is often more unsettling than being told directly. The kindest thing a manager can do, and the most professionally useful, is to tell people where they stand in real time.
- Fear of conflictDevelopmental feedback can feel like criticism, and managers often anticipate a defensive reaction. Most people, when feedback is delivered with care and specificity, respond more positively than expected.
- VaguenessWhen you cannot articulate exactly what you observed and why it matters, feedback stalls. The SBI framework, covered below, solves this.
- Poor timingWaiting for the perfect moment means it never comes. Feedback given within a day or two of the event is far more useful than the same observation delivered weeks later.
- Conflating feedback with judgementFeedback is about behaviour and its impact, not about character. When managers remember this, it becomes easier to give, and easier to receive.
- Inconsistent follow-throughFeedback that leads to no visible change, either in behaviour or in acknowledged progress, loses credibility over time. The loop needs closing: give feedback, track it, return to it.
A simple framework: SBI
SBI stands for Situation, Behaviour, Impact. It is one of the most effective feedback structures because it keeps observations factual, specific, and focused on what actually happened, rather than drifting into generalisations or character assessments.
It works equally well for positive and developmental feedback. The structure forces you to be specific, which is what makes feedback credible and actionable. Vague feedback like "you need to be more proactive" tells people almost nothing. SBI feedback tells them exactly what was observed and why it mattered.
- SituationDescribe the specific context. "In yesterday's project meeting..." or "When you presented to the client last week...". Ground the feedback in a real event, not a general pattern.
- BehaviourDescribe what you observed, not what you inferred. "You interrupted the client twice before they finished speaking" rather than "you were dismissive". Stick to what was visible.
- ImpactDescribe the effect: on you, on the team, on the outcome. "It meant the client did not feel heard, and they pushed back on the proposal" is more useful than "it did not go well".
Making feedback a habit, not an event
Feedback that only arrives during formal reviews is almost always too late to be useful. By the time a pattern is documented in a review cycle, it has often been running for months, and the person receiving it has no idea. Regular, informal feedback that is brief, specific, and timely is far more effective at shaping behaviour and building confidence.
The goal is not to feedback on everything, constantly. It is to develop the reflex to say something when you notice something worth naming, whether that is a genuine strength someone has shown, or a behaviour that needs to shift. Positive feedback is as important as developmental feedback, and often more neglected. People need to know what good looks like, not just where they are falling short.
- Give it promptlyFeedback on a presentation given the same afternoon is more impactful than the same observation made two weeks later. Proximity to the event matters.
- Normalise itIf feedback only comes when something is wrong, people will dread it. Make it routine, both positive and developmental, so it stops feeling like an event.
- Be specificGeneric praise ("you did well") is less useful than specific acknowledgement ("the way you handled the objection in the second half was really effective"). Specificity is what makes feedback credible and memorable.
- Close the loopWhen you give developmental feedback, return to it in a subsequent 1-1. Create an Action from the conversation so neither of you forgets what was agreed. Ask how it landed, whether anything has changed, and what support they might need. Feedback that is never revisited is feedback that does not land.
Feedback in both directions
The most effective feedback cultures are not one-directional. Managers who invite feedback on their own behaviour, genuinely and not as a formality, build far more psychological safety than those who deliver feedback but never ask for it. When your team sees you respond constructively to being told something difficult, it becomes safe for them to do the same.
Ask your team regularly: what could I do more of, less of, or differently to help you? Act on what you hear, or explain why you are not. Use Key Themes to track whether the same feedback keeps appearing-if communication comes up repeatedly, it may be a team-wide issue worth addressing. The 1-1 is a natural setting for this: private, regular, and focused enough for real exchange. Manager Toolkit's catchups feature gives you a place to log these conversations and track the commitments that come from them, so feedback stays live rather than disappearing into a meeting that no one references again.
Keep the feedback thread alive
Log catchup notes so you always know what feedback you gave, and what came of it.